1. Swine flu, H1N1 flu, Avian Flu, SARS, and every other sniffle being labeled as a "pandemic". Get over it, people.
2. Bailouts.
3. "Greening", as if we should be proud of you for it. I'm much more impressed with people who just do it because it's right, not because they'll make a lot more sales through it.
4. The messes on my desk-es.
5. Not having enough life insurance, not having a will, not saving enough.
6. Changing diapers.
7. Being overweight.
8. Feeling obligated to make a full 10 items on this list.
9. Whining.
10. Temptation.
What's your list? Next time - things I can't get enough of!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Typical, Then and Now
Then: 2001 - after 2 years of marriage
Now: 2009 - after 9+ years of marriage and 3 kids
Friday night then: dinner at a decent restaurant, browse the bookstore while we wait for the movie to start, movie, staying up late to watch a show, then maybe a back massage - asleep by 2.
Friday night now: dinner of hot dogs and macaroni & cheese, head to Costco for a patio umbrella, read a couple of stories, play Monopoly and lose 80% of my properties to Paige for a 3-hotel rent on North Carolina Avenue, Mario Kart for a few minutes while everyone else is asleep, in bed by 11:30
Excercise then: running a half-marathon in about 1 hour, 50 minutes; no stops to walk at all
Exercise now: running 3 miles then walking 1, repeat for 13 miles. Feel ashamed because you didn't get enough training in.
Book reading then: about 2 books a week, on top of a full-time job and studying for an actuarial exam
Book reading now: about 1 book every 2 months, on top of a full-time job and 3 kids
Travel then: 3-day short trips to exciting cities like Chicago, St. Louis, or Columbus; 2 bags total.
Travel now: 8-day driving excursions to "family-oriented places" like Branson, Missouri ; 8+ bags, diaper bag, food bag, trash bag, portable high chair, portable crib, portable stroller, portable DVD player, portable insanity.
Church then: Walnut Grove Chapel
Church now: Walnut Grove Chapel - Praise the Lord!
Now: 2009 - after 9+ years of marriage and 3 kids
Friday night then: dinner at a decent restaurant, browse the bookstore while we wait for the movie to start, movie, staying up late to watch a show, then maybe a back massage - asleep by 2.
Friday night now: dinner of hot dogs and macaroni & cheese, head to Costco for a patio umbrella, read a couple of stories, play Monopoly and lose 80% of my properties to Paige for a 3-hotel rent on North Carolina Avenue, Mario Kart for a few minutes while everyone else is asleep, in bed by 11:30
Excercise then: running a half-marathon in about 1 hour, 50 minutes; no stops to walk at all
Exercise now: running 3 miles then walking 1, repeat for 13 miles. Feel ashamed because you didn't get enough training in.
Book reading then: about 2 books a week, on top of a full-time job and studying for an actuarial exam
Book reading now: about 1 book every 2 months, on top of a full-time job and 3 kids
Travel then: 3-day short trips to exciting cities like Chicago, St. Louis, or Columbus; 2 bags total.
Travel now: 8-day driving excursions to "family-oriented places" like Branson, Missouri ; 8+ bags, diaper bag, food bag, trash bag, portable high chair, portable crib, portable stroller, portable DVD player, portable insanity.
Church then: Walnut Grove Chapel
Church now: Walnut Grove Chapel - Praise the Lord!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
How They Got There
As promised, yesterday's comments are now followed-up by my reaction to the end of the book. I quote from the chapter "Chinese Orphanages Today, 2003" of Kay Johnson's Wanting a Daughter, Needing a Son.
"Clearly on the negative side of the balance sheet at the turn of the millennium is the continuing rise of the reported sex ratio at birth, now amongh the highest in the world. In the national census of 2000, the average reported sex ratio at birth was 117 boys for every 100 girls, up from 111 reported in the 1990 census, with Guangdong and Hainan reaching an astounding 130 and 135 respectively. These soaring rates seem to have been achieved with the increasingly widespread use of ultrasound for prenatal sex selection. [here I started to get worried] The ultrasound machine has become ubiquitous throughout the countryside, thanks in part to the government's efforts to monitor all fertile women for pregnancies several times a year. [talk about your invasion of privacy!] This widespread use of ultrasound may mitigate rates of abandonment.
"My own limited research, as well as the more extensive published work of other researches, indicates that ultrasound is commonly used in the countryside to select the sex of a second pregnancy when the first pregnancy produced a girl. [No, that can't be right. Sex selection? Deciding to abort once the baby is far enough along to determine the sex? Nobody would be that cruel...] While those living in one-son /two-child areas are usually happpy to have a first-born daughter, most people want to ensure that their second and last permitted pregnancy is a son. The availability of ultrasound makes that perfect outcome possible. In some villages rumor has it that nearly every second pregnancy of mothers with a daughter is subjected to ultrasound, with abortion frequently resulting if the fetus is found to be another female. [Here I lost it, crying silently into my hand for about 2 minutes - praying for these lost girls, their mothers and fathers, and their culture that would encourage this kind of behavior.]
"By 2001 some provincial governments were cracking down hard on this practice by levying fines for suspicious voluntary abortions not related to health concerns and denying permission for a second birth after such an abortion. Micromanaging the uteruses of hundreds of millions of women has led the state into a morass of intrusive and costly monitoring and proliferating punishments as women attempt to wrest from the state some modicum of control over their own fertility outcomes."
Reading this, I am again reminded of how different our societies are - one in which Judeo-Christian values of liberty, equality, and justice eventually won over prejudice, hate, and historical precent; the other in which individuals are not valued, only names. I am grateful to be here, and hope that I can find ways to change the situation over there.
"Clearly on the negative side of the balance sheet at the turn of the millennium is the continuing rise of the reported sex ratio at birth, now amongh the highest in the world. In the national census of 2000, the average reported sex ratio at birth was 117 boys for every 100 girls, up from 111 reported in the 1990 census, with Guangdong and Hainan reaching an astounding 130 and 135 respectively. These soaring rates seem to have been achieved with the increasingly widespread use of ultrasound for prenatal sex selection. [here I started to get worried] The ultrasound machine has become ubiquitous throughout the countryside, thanks in part to the government's efforts to monitor all fertile women for pregnancies several times a year. [talk about your invasion of privacy!] This widespread use of ultrasound may mitigate rates of abandonment.
"My own limited research, as well as the more extensive published work of other researches, indicates that ultrasound is commonly used in the countryside to select the sex of a second pregnancy when the first pregnancy produced a girl. [No, that can't be right. Sex selection? Deciding to abort once the baby is far enough along to determine the sex? Nobody would be that cruel...] While those living in one-son /two-child areas are usually happpy to have a first-born daughter, most people want to ensure that their second and last permitted pregnancy is a son. The availability of ultrasound makes that perfect outcome possible. In some villages rumor has it that nearly every second pregnancy of mothers with a daughter is subjected to ultrasound, with abortion frequently resulting if the fetus is found to be another female. [Here I lost it, crying silently into my hand for about 2 minutes - praying for these lost girls, their mothers and fathers, and their culture that would encourage this kind of behavior.]
"By 2001 some provincial governments were cracking down hard on this practice by levying fines for suspicious voluntary abortions not related to health concerns and denying permission for a second birth after such an abortion. Micromanaging the uteruses of hundreds of millions of women has led the state into a morass of intrusive and costly monitoring and proliferating punishments as women attempt to wrest from the state some modicum of control over their own fertility outcomes."
Reading this, I am again reminded of how different our societies are - one in which Judeo-Christian values of liberty, equality, and justice eventually won over prejudice, hate, and historical precent; the other in which individuals are not valued, only names. I am grateful to be here, and hope that I can find ways to change the situation over there.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
What I've been learning about Adoption in China
I've just finished reading "Wanting a Daughter, Needing a Son" by Kay Johnson, about the orphanages, abandonments, and adoptions in China from the early 90s through the early 00s. Granted, it was a compilation of academic studies done at various times, so some of the material was a little dated, but I thought I'd share some of the things I have learned.
1. China's "One Child" policy is not exactly that. In many rural areas, the policy has been relaxed to be "One son or two children", meaning that if the first child is a daughter, the couple will be allowed to try a second time to have another child. The intentions of the rule were originally probably good, in that implementation could have slowed runaway population growth, when resources would not have been able to match them (food, water, etc.). However, implementation caused many undesired side effects.
2. There is no state-supported retirement system. Sons are expected to provide for their parents in the parents' old age. These two things go hand-in-hand. There is no system because sons are supposed to provide, and sons must provide because there is no system. Thus the extreme need for a son from each couple.
3. A daughter, when she marries, becomes fully part of her husband's family and essentially breaks most, if not all, ties to her current family. She is to be part of the support system for her husband's parents. Thus, instead of our Western notion of "Two families coming together", it really is more about "Giving a daughter away". This, too, makes extra daughters (above 1) somewhat useless.
4. Parents feel that a son and a daughter make a family complete. Thus there is a need for a son, and a desire for a daughter. Some families will turn to adoption if their first child is a son and they still want a daughter. Unfortunately, this could end up being punished, as local birth planning officials may want to fine the couple for essentially supporting someone else who broke the rules and had too many children, necessitating an abandonment.
5. The "One son or two children" policy was not always strictly enforced. Even when it was, some parents were willing to sacrifice by paying large sums (up to or more than a year's wages) to keep a higher-order birth child.
6. Adoption is prevalent in China, with a majority of the adoptions covered in the book happening through informal means, perhaps after a strategic abandonment on the steps of a childless couple who could take care of a daughter. Some rules surrounding adoption seemed to be made more in the interests of the state than in the interests of the children. For example adoption was not promoted as a good way to rid the state of persons who might otherwise be their responsibility; instead, adoption rules were very strict so that people who were considering abandoning babies would find less of a "market" for their children, thus adding pressure to limit pregnancies. Too, some of the adoptive parents were adopting in violation of the One Son or Two Children policy, to ensure that both genders of child were in the home. They, too, were fined, but because of their desire to see a better outcome for their children, were willing to pay such fines.
I'll have some more tomorrow.
1. China's "One Child" policy is not exactly that. In many rural areas, the policy has been relaxed to be "One son or two children", meaning that if the first child is a daughter, the couple will be allowed to try a second time to have another child. The intentions of the rule were originally probably good, in that implementation could have slowed runaway population growth, when resources would not have been able to match them (food, water, etc.). However, implementation caused many undesired side effects.
2. There is no state-supported retirement system. Sons are expected to provide for their parents in the parents' old age. These two things go hand-in-hand. There is no system because sons are supposed to provide, and sons must provide because there is no system. Thus the extreme need for a son from each couple.
3. A daughter, when she marries, becomes fully part of her husband's family and essentially breaks most, if not all, ties to her current family. She is to be part of the support system for her husband's parents. Thus, instead of our Western notion of "Two families coming together", it really is more about "Giving a daughter away". This, too, makes extra daughters (above 1) somewhat useless.
4. Parents feel that a son and a daughter make a family complete. Thus there is a need for a son, and a desire for a daughter. Some families will turn to adoption if their first child is a son and they still want a daughter. Unfortunately, this could end up being punished, as local birth planning officials may want to fine the couple for essentially supporting someone else who broke the rules and had too many children, necessitating an abandonment.
5. The "One son or two children" policy was not always strictly enforced. Even when it was, some parents were willing to sacrifice by paying large sums (up to or more than a year's wages) to keep a higher-order birth child.
6. Adoption is prevalent in China, with a majority of the adoptions covered in the book happening through informal means, perhaps after a strategic abandonment on the steps of a childless couple who could take care of a daughter. Some rules surrounding adoption seemed to be made more in the interests of the state than in the interests of the children. For example adoption was not promoted as a good way to rid the state of persons who might otherwise be their responsibility; instead, adoption rules were very strict so that people who were considering abandoning babies would find less of a "market" for their children, thus adding pressure to limit pregnancies. Too, some of the adoptive parents were adopting in violation of the One Son or Two Children policy, to ensure that both genders of child were in the home. They, too, were fined, but because of their desire to see a better outcome for their children, were willing to pay such fines.
I'll have some more tomorrow.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
